Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Greetings From Hell

This is a shirt of a postcard sending greetings out to all from Hell. It was given to Jesus by Satan in 1999 as a peace offering, just in time to eliminate the threat of the apocalypse at Y2K. A few months later Jesus grew tired of the novelty of the shirt and gave it away. It eventually ended up in my hands and I was wearing out one day and Satan saw me and started demanding me to tell him where I had obtained this shirt. When he found out I bought it at a thrift store he stormed off in tears. I called Jesus and told him what happened. He raced over to pick me up on his Ninja motorcycled to help him look for Satan. After a few laps around the city we found him on a bridge threating to jump. Satan was hysterical about the shirt, saying that it was a symbol of their love and he had no right to give it away. Jesus went on to explain that the shirt wasn't his style (Jesus wears button-ups), and that their love was worth more than shirt, it was worth heaven and hell colliding in a explosion of fiery hedonism. Satan paused and then slowing stepped away from the edge.
Jesus and Satan hugged for a while with Third Eye Blind's "Jumper" playing in the background. There was a long crane-shot zoom-out and a smooth fade to black.

1 comment:

Aegohl said...

There's a town in Michigan named "Hell" that sells these sorts of shirts as novelty. While I can't be absolutely sure that's where this comes from, it would be a good guess. Very good find. =)